Let’s start things off with an overshare: As a kid, I wanted to know if I was the Chrissy or the Janet, the Wilma or the Betty, the Betty or the Veronica. I realize that I’m seriously dating myself here, but I wanted to know which category I fit into. I was searching for my cookie cutter.
When I started learning about things like astrology, a book was telling me who I was.
Even my last name told me and others who I was and what was expected of me.
Some of us feel like we’re perpetual Cookie Cutter Busters (a person who doesn’t fit the cookie cutter). We sometimes feel pretty great about it, and we sometimes feel kind of lonely about it.
Some parts of our world embraces us Cookie Cutter Busters, but probably not all of it.
Today, I would want to read a book and share a book with others about embracing not being from a cookie cutter and busting through the cookie cutter others might try to place on us. But in the best and friendliest way possible 🙂
Let’s do this!
I love a good Pros vs. Cons list, don’t you?
Pros of being a Cookie Buster (a person who doesn’t fit the cookie cutter):
- Life can be interesting, more unpredictable and colorful
- We get to have fun crafting and curating our whole self through the span of life
- Our self-development doesn’t rely on others and grows
Cons of being a Cookie Buster:
- We might feel lonely and isolated
- Others might not understand us
- Might make having a group harder
Okay, that wasn’t as productive as I was hoping for.
Let’s try by going straight to the core of it:
Feeling like we’re Cookie Busters means that we don’t feel like we quite fit into what’s around us, what’s expected of us or we don’t know how to even cram ourselves into a cookie cutter, and we question whether we even want to.
Have you ever felt that quizzes like What Harry Potter House You Belong To, Myers Briggs and other career and professional assessments, and Oh! so many Cosmo quizzes just don’t capture you?
As an Ayurvedic consultant, I get the question about what Dosha a person is more than any other question by far. People CRAVE to know which Doshic profile they fit into (there are 10 possible options). The danger is this: Using that Doshic profile to create excuses for how we behave and expecting the worse from that profile.
Overshare: I vividly remember one person claiming how it wasn’t their fault, it was their Vata (the Ayurvedic constitution). This person used “Vata” as their excuse for anything and everything. I don’t reduce the effects of having high Vata can create according to Ayurveda, but I do believe that relying on the cookie cutter can be trapping.
More overshare: I don’t much care for molds. In fact, most of the cookies I make with cookie cutters tend to be in quirky and fun shapes, just to shake things up.
I’m getting to the point:
I love what makes each of my loved ones and friends different. I love them so truly that I wouldn’t want to change a single thing about them.
Those things that make us Cookie Busters is what makes us amazing, what people remember of us and what adds flavor and spice to our relationships.
But…
yeah… a “But” was coming… there’s always a but 😉
We, ourselves often shove ourselves into the cutter, trying desperately to fit. Trying to figure out if we’re Griffindor or Ravenclaw, what Pokémon element we would be, which Sex and the City character, if we’re the Rachel or the Monica (again, dating myself)… Well, why can’t we be the Chandler? Because I’m gonna say it, I’m a Chandler.
There I go again, trying to jam into a cutter. Sure, I expanded the cutter to include other choices, but I still tried to make myself fit.
It’s human nature. That’s what it comes down to. I may not have a great psychology book to point you to on this subject, and I wish I did. If you have one to recommend, I’ll be happy to read it.
Sidenote: Have your ever overheard a group of 4-year old girls fighting over which Disney princess they are? ‘Cause I have and it ain’t pretty.
But for now, I can offer this: The Combo.
Aspiring to be in a world without cookie cutters, I suggest this: 1 part knowing about the fact that our mind will likely want to fit into a cookie cutter (even without us actively noticing it) and blend it with 1 part of seeing how we’re not fitting into the cutter and loving every minute of it. Always remembering that being aware of ourselves, inside and out, respecting and loving ourselves, as well as detaching from what we feel is overly expected of us is a great recipe.
Well, I’m gonna go bake some cookies without molds now.
HUGS!
Karine